Italian Grammar: “tu” and “Lei” forms

This lesson is about the informal and formal “tu” and “lei” forms in Italian grammar, and also covers useful phrases for first meetings.

In Italian you use the second person form “tu” (you) when speaking to someone you know or someone of your own age or younger, but the third person form “lei” (he/she) when being formal.

In effect, you demonstrate formality when speaking to someone by using “he/she” instead of “you” (“his/her” instead of “your”, and so on).  

It’s a bit like in English if you were to say “If Sir would kindly refrain from smoking his cigarettes in this public area..”.

So for example, in formal situations we’d say “Che lavoro fa?” (What job does he/she do?) rather than “Che lavoro fai?” (What job do you do?).

Check out these informal / formal versions of conversations you might have on first meeting someone.

INFORMAL: Ciao, come stai? [Hello, how are you?]
FORMAL: Buongiorno come sta? [Good morning, how are you?]
REPLY: Bene grazie [Fine thank you.]

INFORMAL: Come ti chiami? [What is your name?]
FORMAL: Lei come si chiama? [What is your name?]
REPLY: Mi chiamo … [My name is …] / Sono … [I am … ]

INFORMAL: E tu? [And you?]
FORMAL: E Lei? [And you?]
REPLY: Piacere. [A pleasure!]

INFORMAL: Di dove sei? [Where are you from?]
FORMAL: Di dove è?  [Where are you from?]
REPLY: Sono …, di … [I’m (nationality), from (city)]

INFORMAL: Dove vivi? [Where do you live?]
FORMAL: Dove vive?  [Where do you live?]

INFORMAL: Come si scrive il tuo cognome? [How do you spell your surname?]
FORMAL: Come si scrive il suo cognome? [How do you spell your surname?]

INFORMAL: Come si pronuncia il tuo cognome? [How do you pronounce your surname?]
FORMAL: Come si pronuncia il suo cognome? [How do you pronounce your surname?]

INFORMAL: Quanti anni hai? [How old are you?]
FORMAL: Quanti anni ha? [How old are you?]
REPLY: Ho … anni [I am … years old]

INFORMAL: Qual è il tuo numero di telefono? [What is your telephone number?]
FORMAL: Qual è il suo numero di telefono? [What is your telephone number?]

INFORMAL: Qual è il tuo indirizzo? [What is your address?]
FORMAL: Qual è il suo indirizzo? [What is your address?]

INFORMAL: Che lavoro fai? [What is your job?]
FORMAL: Che lavoro fa? [What is your job?]
REPLY: Sono … [I am … ]

INFORMAL: Ciao, alla prossima volta! [Bye, see you at the next time!]
FORMAL: Arrivederla, spero di vederla presto! [Bye, see you at the next time!]
REPLY: A presto! [See you soon!]

Back to Italian lesson on: Italian Verbs In The Present Tense