Buondì.

I would hate to put anyone off coming to Italy, even at this time of the year, when it’s cold and grey.

The shops are pretty, too, so Roomie and I paused on the way back from her daycare to look in the windows in Bologna’s Via Farini. One shop had a huge, blue Christmas tree, entirely build of lego bricks, the children’s construction toy. Another had life-like polar bears, posing in a snowy display, perhaps a papà bear and his cub, like us. We were entranced at the lights, the displays, and the people everywhere.

After Via Farini, we wandered through the ‘French market’. I lifted her up to see where the wonderful smells were coming from. I was feeling so festive, it crossed my mind to stop for a glass of mulled wine. Roomie doesn’t drink wine, so I could have had hers, too.

But instead we headed for the maze of old streets where the fishmongers and cheeseshops draw crowds, and stopped to buy a kilo of cheap beef for a ragù I was thinking of making for dinner.

Finally to the bus stop, in Via Rizzoli, which was packed. Clearly there hadn’t been any buses along for a while, as the crowd was dense and heaving, not fun to navigate with a stroller.

And then four or five buses arrived all together! Ours was the third, so we had to run, weaving between the people. But the bus was already so full that there was no way we’d have got on, so we ran again to the fifth bus in the line, which luckily was also going our way.

I’m a foreigner, wearing a thick, down-filled, winter coat, with a hood that reduces my spatial awareness even when it’s only hanging behind my head.

I’m trying to lift a pushchair, containing fifteen restless kilos, up on to a bus, through a crowd of people who are searching for something to hold on to when the bus moves off, and into the niche reserved for mums and their charges.

It’s not easy, and needs both hands, so for that few seconds I leave my phone in one coat pocket, and the wallet I’ll need to pay for my ticket in the other.

Someone is trying to push pass me, quite rudely, and then does manage to get past, into the space reserved for hapless parents. In an instance, he changes his mind, pushes past me again, and is off, out of the door of the bus, and away down the street. Odd, I thought.

I’m totally unaware I’ve been robbed, until other passengers start asking “Did he get your phone?” They’d all seen it happening, though it wasn’t the phone (thank goodness) but my wallet, containing a hundred euros, three bank cards, and all the usual documents: identify card, driving licence, health insurance card, and so on. All the things that make daily life possible.

Having checked my pocket, for a moment I considered jumping off the bus, which hadn’t yet started to move. I took a couple of steps towards the exit, then looked back at the stroller and its occupant. Giving chase wasn’t a realistic option.

So, this morning I was at the local caserma (office/barracks of the Carabinieri, the military police) when they opened for business at 08.30. The starting point is to do the denuncia, so report the crime, and get a copy of that vital document.

Then to the doctor’s surgery to find out how I could get my prescription meds with no health insurance card (very easily it turns out – I just needed a number, which they gave me.)

Then to the pharmacia to collect the meds. Then to the local comune office, which hosts the anagrafe (register of residents), where they told me that I’d need some photos, and that my residency expired eighteen years ago, but not to worry, as they could fix that easily, except they couldn’t because the system appeared not to be working.

Then to the supermarket to get change for the photo machine, all my bank cards having been stolen, then to get the photos taken in the booth, and finally back to the anagrafe, to have my fingerprints recorded for the new, electronic carta d’identità, which will apparently be posted to me from Rome and is due to arrive in six days.

I still have to go back to the caserma to ask for a document to allow me to drive, and get instructions on how to replace the licence itself, which seems to be a secret which will only be revealed at the right moment. And to replace the health insurance card, of course.

But enough bureaucracy for one day! I have a ragù to cook, and an ‘opera easy reader’ to proof-read, for publication on Monday.

As I was saying, then, don’t let my tale put you off visiting Bologna. Do, though, be aware that gangs of professional thieves work the crowds and are inevitably going to hone in on anyone who looks confused or distracted, so me when I’m wrangling Roomie, and likely you, too, if you look foreign and are speaking English.

It’ll likely not be the badly-behaved drunk or the suspicious-looking foreigner who gives you trouble on public transport (everyone uses public transport here, it’s not just for the poor), but neutrally-dressed young men who work in teams to pick the low-hanging fruit.

In the end, losing a couple of hundred euros, and the time wasted replacing documents, doesn’t matter much.

But it is depressing to be reminded that there are people out there who target the weak…

A venerdì.

P.S. This week, select your own ‘Half-price Ebook of the Week’!

When we’re not publishing and promoting new ebook titles for students of Italian (and other languages), we like to do the occasional ‘Half-price Ebook of the Week’ offer.

Just £3.99 for an ebook that normally sells for £7.99 is excellent value, especially as you can ask for additional versions which are suitable for use on Kindles and other ebook readers, at no extra charge.

The problem with offering one ebook title, though, is level. We use six levels and six half-levels to give an indication of the ease or difficulty of our texts, so that’s quite a range!

Take a look at our online Catalog and try comparing the texts in the FREE sample chapters at different levels, say A1 (the easiest) versus C2 (the hardest). They’re totally different, and it’s that which makes it difficult to select a single ‘Half-price Ebook of the Week’ that will have wide appeal, no matter where people currently are with their language studies.

So we’re experimenting with a different format of promotion, the idea being to offer a coupon code that’s equivalent to a 50% reduction in price on any ‘easy reader’ ebook, and let the potential customers pick one out for themselves.

Last week’s new publication, ‘Rigoletto‘, for instance, is no longer discounted 25% and so sells at our usual ‘easy reader’ price of £7.99.

Were we to offer it as a ‘Half-price Ebook of the Week’ at some point (we usually wait a few years after publication before doing so), then half-price would be £3.99. The difference is £4.

To offer everyone the chance of a half-price ‘easy reader’ at their particular levels, I therefore need to create a ‘one use’ coupon for that amount, £4.

Here it is:

Save £4!

Browse our online Catalog, downloading sample chapters for anything that interests you, until you find one or more titles that will liven up your studies and provide valuable extra reading/listening practice.

Add them to your Cart, in the usual way.

Then copy and paste coupon code Save £4! into your cart (before proceeding with the payment, obviously…) and that’ll reduce the total of whatever’s in there by the promised £4.

Just buy one title, normal price £7.99 and (assuming you remember to use coupon code Save £4! ) the amount charged will be just £3.99.

N.b. This offer ends during the night of Dec. 3rd 2022. Please note that it is one discount, not one discount on each product. Also the technology is set up to be one use per customer, so if you mess up your order (say you choose the wrong payment option), then try again with a new order, the coupon won’t work the second time.

In which case, just email. I’ll fix it for you by deleting the messed-up order, and you’re good to try again, more carefully.

So, ready to pick out your own, personalised -50% BotW (Book of the Week) from our Catalog page?

Don’t forget to take a look at the free sample chapters before you decide what to spend your £4 discount on!

Don’t know where to start? Then try exploring these categories:

Easy readers | History/historical | Literature | Cinema | Opera | Italian-English parallel texts

But also:

French | Spanish | German | Portuguese | Turkish | Swedish

How do I access my ebooks?

When your order is ‘completed’ (normally immediately after your payment), a download link will be automatically emailed to you. It’s valid for 7 days and 3 download attempts so please save a copy of the .pdf ebook in a safe place. Other versions of the ebook, where available, cannot be downloaded but will be emailed to people who request them. There’s a space to do that on the order form – where it says Additional information, Order notes (optional). If you forget, or if you have problems downloading the .pdf, don’t worry! Email us at the address on the website and we’ll help. Also, why not check out our FAQ?

P.P.S.

Did you read/listen to Tuesday’s FREE bulletin of ‘easy’ Italian news?

Subscribers get each bulletin emailed to them, on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Subscribing is also FREE.

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Buondì.

Sorry I’m late today. I was delayed, trying to choose an ‘ebook of the week’ to discount by 50%, so I could then publicise it here.

I’m sort-of between systems, so things are a bit of a mess, and therefore take longer than usual. And because of Roomie occupying big chunks of what would otherwise be my working day, I’m always behind.

Sunday morning was bright and sunny, if still chilly at the crack of dawn when she likes to get out and about. So we put on our gloves and headed for the most distant of our local supermarkets, to stock up on beer and other essentials, while exercising my heart and ageing bones.

En route the wheels of the stroller/pushchair started to drag. I assumed Roomie had jammed a stick in somewhere (she likes sticks – ‘bastoni’, in Italian), so pushed harder.

But we got no more than a few steps further towards the beer restock before a wheel seized up completely.

Of course gloves hadn’t stayed on paws, and had been discarded overboard, where the long knitted cord intended to ensure they remained a pair had wound itself tightly around the axle, this evidenced by a now-oily pink glove peeking out on either side of the wheel.

Oh how I did curse when it wouldn’t untangle and I had to upturn the stroller and get down on my knees in the mud to pull apart wheel and axle sufficiently to eventually release the cord.

Once underway again, we bumped into a former neighbour of mine,  a stocky man, well wrapped up in overcoat and wooly hat, who was standing in the sun on the grassy verge beside the main road, reading something on his smartphone, while his dog ran around him and us in circles on the end of one of those extendable leads.

Smart fellow!

But anyway, I got held up this morning trying to choose a ‘-50% Ebook of the Week’, the problem being my embrionic admin system (I can’t see easily what I’ve done before, or how successful it was) and also the issue of LEVEL.

Ah, level! That’s been the bane of my life ever since I moved across from being a language teacher to running an actual language school, and so having to organise classes that would generate enough revenue to meet the payroll.

Now a layman might think this wouldn’t be so much of a worry. Simple, you organise different groups at different levels, then use a ‘level test’ to advise students which group will be most suitable, and hey presto, you’re off to the bank, loaded down with those pretty, green, hundred euro notes.

But of course, it’s not that simple. For one thing, the marketing efforts might generate such little interest that, once potential students have been tested and advised, you end up with fewer than the minimum number of people in each group. Or more than the maximum in one, and none in the others. There are endless ways this can not work well…

IF the teacher knows her stuff (that’s not a given) you could perhaps get away with a group including students at two adjacent levels (never if there are beginners, though.) But less-experienced staff can mess things up so quickly that reputational damage is almost guaranteed. It can be better to send people (and their money) away, than mess with mixing levels.

E poi, even if you have enough students at each level to form groups that are both coherent in terms of the students’ needs and sufficiently numerous to pay both the teacher and the rent, there’s always going to be someone who will only enrol if they can be ‘in the same class as their friend’. Who, of course, has a wildly different level, and so will upset everyone else in the class.

Or someone who’s a good intermediate, but can only come on Tuesdays, which is the advanced group’s day.

And so on.

When it comes to selling ‘easy reader’ ebooks, I put the level on the cover. How’s the level decided? It’s a combination of what the writer thinks, and what my wife and I think (she does the audio recordings). We use half-levels, too, which helps nail things down.

It’s not exactly scientific, but there’s a free sample chapter, so those who care to can take a look and decide if the material is suitable for them. Though many people don’t do this, which I can never figure… Why would you NOT look at the FREE sample chapter before buying? Boh.

Of course, many people have no idea how the CEFR level system works (it’s six levels, from easiest to hardest, A1, A2, B1, B2, C1, C2) and don’t think of Googling it.

But hey, the real problem is on the other side, with the marketer (me, in this case).

If I’m going to discount one ebook by 50% this week, not only do I have to decide whether to promote something that has previously sold poorly (perhaps no one will want it this time either), or a title has sold lots of copies (the regulars will already have it, then), but I’m back with the problem of level.

Discount an A1 ‘easy reader’ and that might please the beginners. But the beginners haven’t been around long enough to know the value of reading/listening, so may not buy anyway, even if the price is halved and the material is perfect for them.

What about a B1 (intermediate) title, then? The beginners won’t buy that either, or if they do, they’ll complain it’s too hard. And our most loyal clients will look down their snoots at it, as it’s now way too easy.

OK, so lets go for something advanced, and keep the keen kids happy! But no, that might not work either, as the swots will have already downloaded it last sale at a twenty percent discount, so might get riled if I’m now selling it for less.

And then I had, as Italians would put it, a genial idea! (It’s a bit of a false friend, that one.)

How about if I do a coupon that’s equivalent to a 50% reduction in price on an ‘easy reader’ ebook, and let the customers pick one out for themselves??

That should save me a lot of agonising!

‘Pet Walking for Dummies’ normally sells at £7.99, so half-price it would be £3.99. The difference is £4, so I need to create a ‘one use’ coupon for that amount, e via!

Problem solved. The coupon code is:

Save £4!

Copy and paste that into your cart at EasyReaders.org and it’ll reduce the total of whatever’s in there by the promised £4.

This is one use per customer, so if you mess up your order (say you choose the wrong payment option), then try again with a new order, the coupon won’t work the second time.

In which case, just email and I’ll fix it for you by deleting the messed-up order.

Ready to pick out your own, personalised -50% BotW (Book of the Week) from our Catalog page?

Don’t forget to figure out first what the level designation on the cover is supposed to mean.

And to take a look at the free sample chapter!

A mercoledì.

P.S.

Did you read/listen to Saturday’s FREE bulletin of ‘easy’ Italian news?

Many thanks, from the team that produced it, to all of the people who helped out with donations.

Where people specified that their name or message should be listed on the ‘Thanks’ page, then I did that, as promised. But there weren’t many.

The vast majority of people don’t, whether because they don’t know it’s an option, or more likely because they find Paypal’s interface hard to navigate (it is!) and so don’t fill in the relevant part.

If that sounds like you – that you sent the EIN team some cash and hoped, in return, to get your name in lights (and why not?) – then just drop me an email  (from the address you used for the  donation), letting me know that you’d like to be thanked in public, and exactly how: J.Doe, Jane Doe, ‘Janey and her Italian group in Melbourne’, or whatever.

Or if you were meaning to donate but didn’t get around to it, it’s not too late! It’s never too late, as there are always bills to pay.

Visit the Donate page. The next actual appeal will be in January, or sooner if the EIN bank account runs dry.

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